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Showing posts from 2018

A Slap in The Face or A Timely Check?

There's a name, that if someone calls you it, it feels like a slap in the face. And no, it is not profanity. The name is "victim". I am definitely not talking about a "true" victim of some heinous act, God forbid. I am talking about when someone accuses you of being "a victim" or acting like "a victim" regarding how you are handling a situation in your life or handling your life itself. Most of the time we become indignant when this happens. Being a victim definitely translates into the idea of being weak and powerless. Nobody likes that. It would not be a stranger who says this to you. Perhaps that is why it tends to offend us more. Usually it is a friend or loved one, who has been an outside observer, who more than likely loves you and wants to see you take control over a situation or in your life in general. Regardless of their intention or desire for your good, it probably angers you more than it seems helpful.  Because, real talk,

Don't Just Say Your Grace, BE Grace! This Season

In this most auspicious and sacred time of year, so much is going on in every dimension of our lives; mentally, emotionally, spiritually and yes financially.  It is the deepest, most intense time of the year for most of us. It is a concentrated time for being with family and friends which are the cornerstone relationships of life. As always, as we stand at the entrance of this season we will have to confront the interior terrains of our lives. We have to deal with brokenness, disenfranchisement, and a lack of fellowship within our families.  We will have to make tough decisions about who we will break bread with, who can sit at the table, who is uninvited, who is banned and who is damned.  We have to determine whether we will forgive for the sake of the holidays; if we are willing to be in the company of our loved ones; even if we will make up ( so that we can get Christmas presents) . Many of us have to deal with loss. The loss of our mother, father, child, sister, brother, grandpar

Life's Big Secret! A Key To Success

There exists a phenomena that is such a huge part of life yet it remains a mystery and secret to most human beings.  It is integral, recurrent, and critical to our living life successfully, but it seems to elude us. It is an intangible and invisible dimension of Life.  We hear references about it quite often, we've all heard it called by name, and yet it remains an enigma to most of us.  I believe that if we fully understood and embraced this very important aspect of life, the quality of our lives would improve exponentially. What am I speaking of? I'm glad you asked. It is called "the process." How many times have you been going through situations in life and realized yourself or were told by others about "the process" in various ways. You are going through a trial and your supportive community tells you, "oh, it's just a process" you are going through, "everything is a process."  We also are encouraged to "honor the proce

INTERRUPTIONS: Enter Eruptions

I planned to write about "transitions" today, but something else showed up.  I had two "interruptions" this morning, one woke me up out of my sleep, the other came after my morning devotion, as I was about to begin write this blog. These were two interruptions of the same kind, but there are two very different types of interruptions in Life. It is an important distinction to know that all interruptions are not the same.   I think one of the most important tools we can get in life skills, is the ability to manage "enter/eruptions", because like the saying;  life happens  while we are planning our lives.  For many of us, it feels like Life is really a series of interruptions. Our intentions, goals and plans always seem to  get interrupted; at least that is what we explain to others about why we are not progressing as we thought we would.  Well, if that is the case, it would behoove us to not really discern what is happening when we "get" in

What Is The Music Of Your Soul

Today, during my morning Devotion, I read from one of my favorite books. The author referred to "the Doubter within" as she talked about our inner feelings.  It made me think of our "interiors"; our real selves as human beings; that is, as  Spiritual Beings .  A question arose within me, " W hat is the music of your Soul?" I know that the Soul is the place in our tri-une Being that represents our Thoughts, Mind and Will.  I speculated that the music of one's Soul  must correlate to the tone or quality of one's thoughts. I began to think about my own symphony . If I were to contemplate on the kind of music that my Soul most resonated to, what kind of music would it be? What would yours be?  Would it be a happy, upbeat tune.  Or would it be a funeral dirge? Would the song of your Soul, that is played most be like the intro to a scary movie... (dum, dum, dum, dummm!) leaving you in a constant state of anxiety, suspense and fear; waiting f

A Better Quality Of Life...The Moment!

As I am always reflecting on life, or more so, being "present" to life on a moment by moment basis, the word "quality" jumped up at me; that is "quality of life". I began to think about the fact that we all, every human being on the planet, wants, even yearns for "a better life."  We are actually created from deep within to want more, to want better.  I wondered, though, "what does that really mean?"   Immediately I heard the chorus of humanity, a definite majority say, of course having a better life would mean "HAVING MORE". Unanimously and loudly they said, first and foremost a better life would happen immediately if I had, MORE MONEY!  Having more money would SOLVE every problem that I have right now.  Hello, everybody "knows" (believes) this!  The reality is that we all know (deep down inside) that it's a lie, an untruth.  We all know people personally and famously (celebrities and such) who testif

Making "Peace" With Your Hair!

I was doing my daily devotional reading and in one of my all time favorite books, the inspiration of the day was on a subject that I have lived for most of my adult life, that is "HAIR".   Now the author, Sarah Ban Breathnach, whose words I adore, is not Black but she is a Woman, and she speaks Truth.  I believe the language and experience of HAIR transcends race and  touches all women. Unique to Black Women is the fact that we have actually had "to fight" for the right, t o wear our God-given Natural Hair, because of Slavery. I loved the title of her writing, it was perfect. Really there was nothing to add to it, which is how Truth works.  The concept of "making Peace with our Hair", is certainly a woman's reality, especially for women of color. For us "making Peace with our Hair" translates essentially into "GOING NATURAL".  That is, going "cold turkey" from the drugs (perms) and the instruments of destruct

Fighting For Your Peace...What?

I am a "Peaceful" person. Most people who know me would attest to that. Ironically, I came from a family background of constant and unpredictable arguing and fighting; even physical fighting (probably like many dysfunctional Black families). It usually began early mornings, carried on throughout the day and many times ended late in the night.  It happened on weeknights and was really blazing on weekends and holidays. I am sure I decided to find the path of Peace, a lifestyle of Peace , in response to my early childhood experiences.   As a grown woman, a legacy aged woman , I feel that I have achieved a definitive level of peace in my life.  The journey was relentless however. It had to be.  I pursued the Healing of my Soul in every way I could. As I reflect back on my journey;  I probably tried every therapeutic modality available. I read books, listened to tapes, joined groups, stayed in shut-ins, took courses, went on trips, cleansed, fasted, sweated, sat on couches a

OWNERSHIP Pt. II: "Own" The Night

A s promised we are continuing our conversation about Ownership .  I gave an offering for the daytime, now here comes the night!  Of course, by nightfall, we are all mostly tired and worn out. We have dealt with bosses, co-workers, children, husbands, friends, enemies and everything else walking on two feet.  By the time it's time to lay down and go to sleep, most of are either too tired to go to sleep, to worried to sleep, ruminating over the day that's now past or impending the doom of the next day. Indeed it feels like there is no rest for the weary! Once again, we return to the sacred domain and power of the Mind, our thoughts. We know that somehow we must stop thinking and rest our minds in order for us to sleep. The night feels much heavier than the morning when we can invent our day and create expectations for ourselves. At night, we are left with the realities of what happened that day.   Let's be honest "there is no easy way out."  We must  make a s

OWNERSHIP: What Do You Own?

So much of our identity as human beings, we often think, is based on "what we own."   So many of us are rooted and grounded in that. We believe that "who we are" literally means "what we have" , that is, what we possess, material things. The more we "have" (things), the more we can boast, the more successful we think we are, the more superior than those around us we think we are. The idea of ownership, being the Owner of something , makes us feel powerful. It's intoxicating. We can feel real "puffed up" even if we own just two little things, an expensive car and a home.  Oh, let me add expensive jewelry, clothing and money for the record. For many of us having these things can make us think and feel that we have arrived. Actually looking at these possessions so monumentally, seems meager and pitiful in a way. The "possessions" that we own and are so proud of, are  usually "possessing" us.   Truthfully spe

BeYouTy Becomes Legacy!

I am very excited to re-enter the stage and to continue sharing with you from the majestic landscape of "BeYouTy". It's been about a year and a half since I have written here.  Not to be cliche', but "where did the time go"? One thing that usually gets in the way of starting is starting . Ideally, you want to have a map of how you will approach everything and lay it out completely. What I have come to learn about myself is that I simply do not operate that way. I have self-integrity. I will get it done ultimately.  I always have the concept and vision in my Soul and Spirit, before I start. What it becomes however, is " my  glorious journey ." I have always lived on the "revelation" and daily "discovery" road. At the end of the day, when I reflect on my accomplishments in life thus far, I usually say, "not too bad."  I am content. As I am now in what some call "legacy years". Indeed I am looking forwa