HAIR CONVERSATIONS: Bold Moves: Bald to Blossom

Yesterday I had a wonderful visit from a Sister who came to the New Bein’ Showroom in Brooklyn to buy New Bein’ Hair Care Products.  She had read my book (Hairlocking, Everything You Need To Know) and it inspired her.  She had been contemplating starting Locs and had done extensive research.  What a Divine visit.  This young Sister was intelligent, spiritual, and very self-aware.  She spoke quite poetically about her “hair journey” up until this point (she’s in her mid 30’s).  Some of the things she said really struck me.  She said she was “the dark one” in her family (even though she’s really like caramel toned). Everyone else was "light-skinned".  She had really thick, long, black beautiful hair though, so she was acknowledged for her hair. She said she realized at a young age, that her hair was her “identity” (wow…!)  As she got older she recognized that she had lived and bought into this, even as far as the men she had attracted in her life with her hair.  Unfortunately, her intelligence usually out-shined her hair, so she was kicked to the curb on a few occasions.  As an adult woman, mature and self-confident, she made a bold decision, SHE CUT OFF ALL OF HER HAIR. SHE WENT BALD! This of course, was not acceptable for women in 2003.  She felt that Her Spirit required that she make a drastic move to help herself (and others) see her for who she really was.  What a bold and courageous move!  She has since blossomed into her own woman and has remained “natural” until today.  She walked in with a beautiful bouquet of natural hair seemingly on the verge of locking in a New York minute.

Our conversation got me thinking about a lot of things. One take away was how OUR HAIR as Black women especially, is so much a part of our Identity. This includes our self-esteem, our femininity, our sexiness, our confidence; so many aspects of who we are.  It made me wonder about “the hair conversations” that we have within ourselves (internally, in our heads).  These unspoken thoughts and conversations (she called them “the community”) are critical in shaping and developing our self-identity. We really need to pay attention, listen and hear what they are.  What has your personal history been?

Today Sister, reflect on this question: What is your hair saying to you? What has it been saying to you throughout your life; in your past and especially today.  The future of your “hairstory” is literally, in your hands!

QueenNE (Nekhena Evans)

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